Saturday, April 25, 2009

20 Things You Need to Know About Your Resume

1. Anything you say on your resume, can and will be used against you in the HR department.
2. Resumes are an efficient method for employers to say no in 60 seconds or less.
3. You take this pile; I’ll take that pile and will just toss this pile!
4. There is no such thing as a right or wrong resume
5. If you ask for ten different opinions; that’s exactly what you’ll get
6. Your cover letter will not be read!
7. Every time you chaotically surrender your resume, you are giving the employer as many reasons as he needs not to talk to you
8. Everybody’s a resume expert; just ask your accountant
9. The world needs more damn books about how to use a resume and fewer writers
10. The length of your resume does not matter!
11. Scanner ready resumes...This is Major Bull!
12. Your name, phone number & email needs to be on every page; go have a look I bet it isn’t!
13. Nobody cares about what you did in 1980
14. Next time a potential employer asks you to email your resume, ask when you can bring one in person
15. When an employer asks for your resume; what they are really saying; “I don’t have time for you right now”!
16. Never give your resume to a friend
17. Never bring your resume to a networking meeting
18. Never put your resume on the Internet unless of course you are vying for the butcher, baker, candlestick maker position
19. The Resume was invented and designed as a screening mechanism
20. Multimillion dollar business deals are consummated, execuitves are joining forces and employers are uniting with key executive talent everyday without the use of a resume!

I am sure that the above will spur your comments; you will absolutely love my answers. Hopefully, if we ban together we can do away with this ridiculous document all together!

Best,
John Seraichyk

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

some very interesting recommendations. I especially like point 9 and 15. Thankx for the post

Jo-Ann Fair said...

I agree with you. I think we should get rid of this document as well.

JOHN said...

Thanks ANONYMOUS....9 IS MY FAVORITE TOO

JOHN

JOhn said...

Hi Jo-Ann

Yes, we really need to start some sought of movement (: ..... Generally speaking, I only use resumes as a way to placate the HR screening mecahnisim..

ASB said...

John,

This is some thought provoking information. I'm in agreement with many of these observations, but I would like to know what your reasons behind #16 are.

-ASB

exec said...

Hi ASB,

Even though your friends intent is always good, when he/she hands your resume to his boss, it still may be used to screen you out. The point here is to be sure you know what the bosses needs are and be sure to give your friend a tailored letter or if necessary a modified resume to best meet the needs of your friends employer and ask your friend for a follow up commitment with his/her boss; don’t be shy….

Good Luck
Executive Jobs Guys

nisha said...

Awesome site. Very informative and nice design. I really like your posts and your style.
mba

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